Ways to Honor Sekhmet-Who-Is-Mut

Because She is a syncretic deity, Sekhmet-Mut can be a difficult deity to work with “cold” (that is, with no prior introduction). In my case, I hadn’t even considered Her as a deity to honor until my Rite of Parent Divination; prior to that, I prayed to straight-up, original-flavor Sekhmet. When She came to me in my RPD as Sekhmet-Mut, I spent much of my time getting to know Her as Sekhmet, but have only recently realized that my Mother is so much more Mut than I originally believed.

If I had infinite time, I would cross-reference all the instances in antiquity where Sekhmet is placed in Mut’s roles and Mut is placed in Sekhmet’s roles, and come to some kind of conclusion as to the exact function of the syncretic deity. But I don’t have that kind of infinite time, so I can only ask Her directly, and act based on Her requests of me.

In my experience, She is the goddess Who embodies the active, powerful justice of Sekhmet, enthroned in the palace of Mut. She is the regal queen Mut, bringing forth the (often painful) Ma’at that Sekhmet brings. She holds the power to wipe out the enemies of Ra, and from Her throne, sends forth Her fury or shows Her mercy. Because She is also Sekhmet the Mother, She heals with the kindness of a Mother’s embrace.

When to honor Sekhmet-Mut:

• When seeking any kind of healing, especially from having been wronged.
• When seeking justice, especially when you have been physically or emotionally hurt.
• When you need to be compassionate while disciplining or passing judgment.
• When you need to be strict and are finding it difficult.
• When you need to do something difficult or painful yet appropriate.

How to approach Sekhmet-Mut:

Light a candle and some sweet, floral, or spicy incense (amber, sandalwood, frankincense, lotus or especially Morning Star’s iris incense are all good). Present a meaningful offering. Simple offerings are fine, but should not be hasty or thoughtless. Rather than offering cheap champagne, consider bringing Her flowers from your garden or something you have made. Offer heartfelt, humble prayers. Remember She is a queen, and be particularly respectful; She will not scorn you for an accidental mistake, but don’t be deliberately casual in your first prayers to Her. As you build a relationship with Her, you may get more comfortable — or not, depending on how you get along with Her. Divining for Her messages may be appropriate. To maintain a relationship with Her, honor Her regularly, and She will become a part of your life. She is often quieter than original flavor Sekhmet, less “hot”, and more “watery” in nature.

Back to life…

… although I haven’t quite been dead.

Some background on why this blog has been mostly dormant for the last 6 months:

In October, the town I live in was devastated by “Superstorm” Sandy. Since then, my life has been simultaneously a whirlwind, and completely stagnant. My family’s house was partially destroyed and rendered unsafe for living. (Point of Information: I am still under 30 and still living with my parents; our household includes three adults, one child and a dog.) We lived in the broken structure for two months before we could find accommodation at a hotel even slightly nearby. At that point, we were told that our home would be repaired by February. We waited, and waded through endless red tape and confused town policy. Errors and other delays held up the work on our house.

We finally moved back in roughly a month ago. We lifted the house 10 feet higher, and replaced the entire first floor. Because we started our repairs so early, we are locked out of most of the grants and funding being made available through the government, but we ate getting too tired to fight. Our flooring is currently being replaced, as is our siding. We have a bathroom again, and furniture in the living room. It isn’t a finished home, but it’s something we can live with.

Through all of this, my practices have languished. The very act of living has taken up every ounce of energy I have. I have lived in a fragmented space, feeling frayed and fractured myself. Now that we are settling back in, I find myself rebuilding my practices slowly. I say prayers, offer cool water, light candles and incense.

My priestly work has been suspended, but next month I will return to my duties. That, for me, feels like the greatest triumph. Kneeling before the State shrine again, speaking the words that nourish the gods – I live for that. I crave the space to serve again.

With the return of my priestly work will come the return of regular posts here. I am slowly stepping back into the real world. For a time I was carried off by the flood, but no longer. I miss the real world and all it contains.

Because I’m Kemetic… (Kemetic Roundtable)

How does being a Kemetic affect your daily life? Does it? Do you do things differently than you used to because of your faith/religion?

The short answer to this question is a resounding YES. There is very little of my life that has not changed radically since I began my Kemetic practices. I’ve written about this before, but it bears repeating: I became Kemetic when I was 17, in the summer before my first year of college. I finished growing up under the watchful eye of Ma’at, guided by the Lord of Truth and the Eye of Ra upon Her Throne.

Knowing Ma’at enabled me to work at being mindful of the consequences of my actions. Being a part of the House of Netjer opened opportunities for me that I never would have taken otherwise — not just spiritually, but socially. I took my first roadtrip with fellow members. My first solo plane trip was to Tawy House for my Rite of Parent Divination at the first RPD weekend event. I have grown as a person because I was given a space to explore, in a way I never would have otherwise. Until going to college and becoming Kemetic, I led a narrow, sheltered life. Because of my faith, I stepped far outside my comfort zone and grew in ways I never thought I could. 

I have a tendency to build my life around the ability to do a daily rite, ensuring that I have enough time and space to undertake ritual. All of that is currently on hold given my current situation post-Sandy, but I am constantly trying to work out ways I can get back into my usual routine. My classes, my job, my room — it’s all laid out so that I can keep a daily shrine routine. I want to make serving the gods a priority, so I deliberately take steps to ensure I am always able to serve.

When I shop for food or snacks, I tend to try and buy things that I can also use as offerings. This works out pretty well, since I tend to like the same things that my gods do (coincidence, or planning on Their part? I don’t know). I try to always have something reasonably general I can offer on hand. Normally this takes the form of tea, water, small candies or incense.

I have little habits that come out in quiet ways. I offer quiet prayers to my Father when I am driving. I greet Ra when I see Him rising in the morning. I greet the moon as Khonsu when I see Him in the evening. I thank Bast for the colors of the dawn. I greet my Akhu and my beloved Nut when I see the star speckled sky. I see my Mother in the blood-red of the setting sun.

I don’t feel that there is anything specific I do differently because of my religion. I don’t stop in the middle of an activity to say, “Hey wait, I’m Kemetic, so shouldn’t I (x)?” My sense of what is right, ethical or appropriate has decidedly been influenced by my gods and Ma’at, but it is difficult to say how in a concrete example. I have grown into a space where my whole consciousness is influenced by the relationship I have with my gods and with Kemet.

To anyone who is just beginning a journey with the Kemetic gods, I would say: practice mindfulness of Ma’at, and She will make Herself at home in your life. If you choose small moments to be conscious of Her hand in the world, then She will change you. The longer you practice your faith, the more it will become a regular part of you life, until you have trouble remember what parts of you came before Kemet and which came with Kemet. I am fond of talking about religion as though it were a relationship. As you grow in a relationship, you move from an ecstatic experience of new relationship energy to a quieter, more familiar partnership. When you grow in your faith, it is much the same: the ecstasy falls away to leave a new, comfortable world.

Kemetic Roundtable – Patron Deities (or, “Are You My Mummy?”)

The concept of a “patron” deity, or a main deity, or a “Parent” deity comes up a lot in Kemetic practices. Heck, it comes up often in any pagan/polytheist practice. Look at any online meeting place for polytheists, and you’ll find a number of people introducing themselves not only by their path, but also by the deities they primarily honor. It’s a way of categorizing ourselves, and a way of finding like-minded individuals. Is it necessary to have a primary deity? I don’t think so. Is it something that will most likely happen, one way or another? Probably.

I think it would be helpful to draw some distinctions in terminology, here. In Kemetic Orthdoxy, a “Parent deity” specifically refers to part of the outcome of the Rite of Parent Divination, which is a rite of passage into the Kemetic Orthodox faith, in which the deities who are responsible for an individual are revealed by divination. The Parent deity (or deities, up to two) tends to act as a patron deity for the person, though not always. People who have had the rite done refer to themselves as children of whichever god or goddess. It is specific to Kemetic Orthodoxy, and is only necessary if you’re going to make that your primary practice.

A patron, or main deity, is a more general term for the god one seeks the most interaction with — the most offerings made, the most prayers said, the most devotion given. Anyone can have a main deity, or a patron deity. Anyone can forge a close relationship with a god. For that matter, anyone can call that deity their “Parent” deity – it is only within Kemetic Orthodoxy that the term “Parent” carries a ritual meaning as well as denoting a relationship.

Terminology aside, I think most people will find themselves with a main deity or deities. It may not be that there is one singular god who is completely in charge, but given the number of gods in the Kemetic pantheon it is highly unlikely They will all get equal treatment. There are a LOT of gods in Kemet with a LOT of different personalities. Simple logistics and interpersonal preferences dictate a need for selecting appropriate deities for oneself. Sometimes this is as simple as self-selection: finding the deity whose domain or personality suits you best and approaching Them. Sometimes, deities come knocking and tell us, in Their own way, that we belong to Them. Finding one’s main deity is an intensely personal process, I believe. Nobody can tell you how to decide which gods to honor. If you’re just starting out, and you want to honor Yinepu, I believe you should. You might find that as you get to know Him, other deities step in and draw your attention away from Him. You might find that you form a deep, personal relationship with Him. You may find that He directs you away, to other deities.

It’s a journey, and it’s one with many steps and turns and twists. You may start with one deity as your patron, and then find others entering your practices. You may undergo the RPD expecting one Parent, and be surprised by a second Parent and several Beloveds. You may begin your practices honoring several deities, and find yourself gradually focusing on one. I started my practices honoring Yinepu and wound up with Wepwawet; I denied that I would ever worship Sekhmet because I wasn’t “cool enough”.  My advice to beginners? Be bold enough to approach the gods; be open enough to hear Their reply; be humble enough to remember that the god you want might not be the one for you; be proud enough to acknowledge when They are calling you.

A journey, a confession, a word of comfort.

Before I get to the meat of this post, I need to write a disclaimer: this post is in no way meant to be advice, counsel, or a suggestion for anyone’s practices. This is only my story, shared in support. I actually don’t recommend following my path, here. I chose it, and I know deeply how much it has helped me – but it is by far not going to be the best path for many. Please accept this post in the spirit of its writing: know that I have been there too, I still find that place sometimes, and I am standing with you.

[trigger warnings: self harm]

—-

The first time I wanted to do Senut, during my Beginners class, I was kicked out of shrine. My eagerness was met only with disappointment. The Jackal, even then the lord of my heart, folded His arms before me.

I told you the consequences, came His quiet reproach. My stomach ached with regret. I did know the consequences. I knew my agreement with Him. And yet, somehow I had hoped that the gods would be more lenient; maybe They would let it slide the first time, because it was supposed to be my first time.

I tried again, ending with disaster: I spilled the natron water all over my ritual script. I dropped the water bowl and shattered it in the shower. Company came by early, which put that day’s efforts to a complete end. All the while I felt Sekhmet shaking Her head gently.

Not now, not yet. You made a promise.

—-

Eleven years ago, I hurt myself for the first time, more out of curiosity than anything. There were an infinite number of reasons: I felt alone, I felt unwanted, I felt scared, like I could never succeed or be good enough — and on and on. By the time I found my gods (or They found me), I was feeling more stable, more healthy, and I desperately didn’t want to hurt myself anymore. But self-harm is hard to shake; it clings and nestles in the mind, directing thoughts and actions. So while I wanted to be well, I wasn’t, yet.

As my relationship with the gods of Kemet deepened, They began to gently nudge me about my habits. It hurt Them to see me hurting. When we had forged a strong and constant relationship, They offered me a challenge: if I hurt myself, They would consider me in the same state as though I were menstruating until any wounds healed. That was what They offered, to help me achieve my goal – and I accepted.

When I went to approach Senut for the first time, I had hurt myself the day before. They would not let me even try. It was not a punishment, just a fact. It is what They asked, and I freely accepted. I wanted Them to pat me on the back and let it slide. I wanted to be told, “We’ll let it go this time.” It didn’t happen. I learned that if I wanted to serve my gods, I needed to take care of myself.

It is never about shunning me, or putting me down for what I’ve done. It is an agreement, as clinical as a legal contract: If x, then y. It is Their intervention, Their method of teaching me a better way. As I’m typing this, it sounds harsh, and I wish I could find a way to make it sound less so. Believe me when I say, it never felt harsh. They never turn me away or fall silent for my mistakes; often They are most present in these moments. Even now, when I forget myself and reach for old habits, the rules have not changed.

And I do forget myself, and I do slip back into old cycles. I am human, and I have learned a behavior that is, unfortunately, very effective — and so I turn back to it, now and then. I have skills in place to help me choose better ways to cope with the things that would have broken me in the past, but even so: I still feel those urges, still feel the nagging at my heels that says, “this is easier.”

And then I struggle with myself, because I am a priest, and this affects more than just my purity. It affects my work, it affects my responsibilities. It is a part of what I need to consider in my personal purity assessment, before I do any rite requiring purity.

Under no circumstances is my approach appropriate for everyone. I have been actively working to break these habits for years, and abstaining from formal ritual was Their practical solution. I firmly believe, and repeat often, that purity is between you and your gods. Care for yourself however makes the most sense. Connecting with the gods is foremost how so many of us find grounding and healing when we are feeling fractured and worn, myself included. Never deny yourself the company of the gods simply because you are hurting. If that means handling purity differently than I do, good. No one else can dictate what you do in your personal shrine unless you want them to.

—-

Why am I writing this now? Today is Self Injury Awareness Day. I know there are other Kemetics who struggle with the same urges. Self-harm is a unique purity issue for me, and I’m sure there are other Kemetics who feel uncomfortable or impure dealing with this themselves. I am a priest in my community; I know there are people who read my blog and look up to it. I need the community to know that it is okay to struggle, that the gods will not abandon you for hurting yourself, that you can feel hurt and impure and yet zep tepi will come, the wounds will heal, and so will you.

We are given the opportunity, every dawn, to recreate ourselves. Every dawn is a new universe. If you are actively working to stop hurting yourself, remember this: that from the beginning of this creation, from the moment today’s new world came into being, you have not hurt yourself. You are made, today, as someone who has not hurt themselves at all. I find so much power in this, and I hope you can too.

Jackal Moment:

The moon, the radio, my hands on the wheel… and my unwavering, steel-strong devotion to my Lord. Bliss.

Still connected…

Even though things are stressful and difficult, and all my practices have been reduced to the very basic necessities, I somehow feel very centered and grounded. I don’t feel closed off; I have a sense of the gods and the Unseen world around me. I’m not terribly involved in it – but it’s there, I see it, and I can reach out to it if I want.

It’s good to feel this way.